Congratulations!...Who's Next?

So, I got on facebook today (like I do every day) and I noticed that one of my friends just got engaged. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm super excited for them and couldn't be happier! It's a beautiful thing when a girl finds the guy she's been waiting for her whole life - the guy that God promised to her. I guess it's just a little...overwhelming for me. I feel like I'm getting to that age where everybody seems to be finding their "one" and my friends are getting married faster lightening strikes. I'm truely am happy for everyone who has marriage in the picture and congratulate them on embarking on this new journey. As for me? Now I'm just numb to it all. I'm just left asking, "Who's next"?

I'm so used to seeing pictures of engagement rings and status updates that say "I'm the luckiest girl in the world!<3" and "I love my husband.. how did I manage to snag him ;]". You all know what I'm talking about. That's all cute and nice, but, being a fellow single, it's enough to make you want to puke at times. Like I said, I'm happy for them, but really, do you gotta rub it in our single faces? Psh. 

It takes everything within me not to be jealous at times, wishing it was me who got to say that. Somtimes I wonder why that girl landed the amazing, gorgeous, Christian guy I dream of and not me. Sounds pretty selfish, right? Believe me, I'm working on it. But the thing is, I get to the point where I get rather upset with God, saying "really, God? SERIOUSLY? What's wrong with me? Why am I still single while everyone else is getting married? Am I not "content" enough with You? Am I not secure enough in my singleness and totally love-blind with You to be totally caught off guard by 'the one'? Am I not outgoing or appealing enough to the type of guy I want to attract? Do I not measure up to the other amazing christian girls who seem to attract these guys? What's wrong with me?"

Truth is, these questions are gonna ruin me and lead me down a desctructive, spiral path to nowhere - fast. I've slowly realized that these doubts about myself, along with if God has a guy for me, are not thoughts from God. They're simply from Satan. He wants us to get impatient and frustrated to the point where we give up and sell ourselves short; lowering our standards, giving away our purity, or becoming self-conscious, unconfident beings. He wants us to forget the fact that we are made in the beautiful image of God and search for love from a mere mortal man. He's the one who's putting these questions into our head, and yet we direct our frustration and blame toward God.

Two truths I've learned in my time of singleness that should help other singles who feel the way I do:

1) You don't have to "be content" before you're man will come. "May he grant you the desires of your heart, and may all your plans succeed" (Psalms 20:4). A friend of mine once showed me a youtube video of a preacher speaking about singleness. He pointed out that we've filled our heads with the idea that you have to be "content" with God before He'll bring 'the one' into your life. Since when do we need to be content with being single? God created us to be united with man. He put that desire in our hearts. Why would we tell us to push that desire away and pretend it doesn't exist just to please Him? The part I liked in the video was when he said "you can be content with where you are right now, but that doesn't mean you want to be content with that down the road".

2) Be Patient. "But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience." (Romans 8:25). I know, you've probably heard this a thousand times just like I have. In my oppinion, it's the most annoying thing a person could tell a single women. "God has a great guy in store for you. You just have to be patient. It'll happen eventually". Yeah, that's coming from a married or dating woman! Thanks, alot. In all serious, though, patience is key. It shows that you're trusting God that He's going to fulfill his promise - to grant you the desires of your heart. "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." (Hebrews 11:1). When we have faith in God, we are CERTAIN, even though circumstances in life might tell us otherwise. We can be sure of this: God is faithful and he "works all things for the good of those who love him" (Romans 8:28). Since this is truth, why is it so hard for us just be patient, enjoy life, and rest in the fact that God has it all worked out?

Believe me, this is one of my biggest struggles. But I find comfort and peace knowing that God has it all together and he truly is going to bring me the "man of my dreams" who will be my perfect "other half" and together, we will do some major, awesome, amazing things for the glory of God. It's all apart of his plan.

So congratulations, couples!....I'm next.

Holding On

Holding On By Jamie Grace

Holding On.
Have you ever actually listened to the words of this song? It's more than just a nice, sweet "catchy" tune. It has a message bigger and more powerful than Jamie Grace probably anticipated.

All the signs of life...They’re all around me with every heartbeat...I feel so alive...I am joy and sadness, Peace and madness...

Ahh, the joy and peace that God brings to our lives. A pastor once told me 2 simple truths that, if we keep them straight, we'll have a better understanding of God and his will for our lives. The truth is, hate comes from fear, which leads to death. Love comes from faith, which leads to life. Satan is hate. God is love. Think about that for a moment. Satan tries to put anger, fear, resentment, jealousy, grief, pain, lust, pride, greed, and vanity into our lives. Continuing down a road filled with these idols will lead to death. God wants to "give us life to the fullest" (John 10:10). We love the one who has promised us eternal life. We hate the one who has come to "steal, kill, and destroy" (also, John 10:10). No matter what life throws at us, we put our faith in the one who brings life. It's so great knowing we have joy in sadness and peace in madness.

If only I can fight just a little longer
I know It’s gonna make me stronger

This part reminds me of James 1:2 "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of any kind. Because you know the testing of your faith develops perserverence. Perserverence must finish it's work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything". Perserverence. Just keep going. Continuing to press on even in hard times is never easy. There's going to be many times where you'll be tempted to give up and walk away from it all. But these times are beautiful! You don't move by standing still. You can't grow into the person God intends for you to be if you continue to stay where it's comfortable. God wants to mold you into his likeness. And literally transform you.

I just keep holding on to what I believe..Oh, I believe in you..Give me the strength to fight..And the heart to believe..When it’s hard to believe in you.

Oh man, this part really hits home for me. For a girl who struggles with wavering- believing in God but letting doubts and skepticism consume my mind- I can relate all to well. Sometimes, it's hard to believe in God. Either circumstances seem bigger than our reality, or doubt about who God is starts to get in the way. Sometimes, I get to the point where I question my faith to the core. "Is the Bible REALLY the word of God? Does he REALLY love me that much?" I know it in my heart, but I can't get my head to believe it as well. Please tell me I'm not the only one who thinks like this at times.

Oh and these are the times when doubt’s tryin’ to creep in...And I need a reason that’s larger than life when hope seems hard to find
Jamie Grace understands. I cannot tell you how many times in life you're going to doubt and be tempted to throw it all away. Obviously, I hope you don't but it seems inevitable, doesn't it? What I learned I needed was patience. "Faith grows exceedingly" (2 Thessalonians 1:3). We are always going to grow in our faith, and that doesn't stop in the hard times. In fact, sometimes you grow the MOST during those times. Hard times and times that we aren't on our "God High" is when we really got to dig deep, press on, and have patience. We know that God has great things in store for us and "through faith and patience (we) inherit what has been promised". (Hebrews 6:12). With patience, faith will come.
Trust me, this is hard for me to grasp too. I've always wondered how do you actually SHOW God you trust and believe in him. It's one thing to say you do, but actually doing it is another this. Truth is, you show you have faith by your words and your actions. So when you continue to press on and say "God I trust you" while reading aloud Bible verses, you are showing you have faith.

Thank you, Jamie Grace, for creating a song so relavent to life. It's always comforting to know you're not alone in your thinking. If I can encourage you all with anything, it's to have patience, press on, and keep holding on.